Dr. Maddow's new nerd headquarters

Rachel Maddow has purchased a 1,300-sq ft loft in the West Village, having grown tired of her current "van-sized" apartment in a brownstone elsewhere in the village. This will be her weekday home in NYC—which she shares with artist girlfriend Susan Mikula—and I assume they still have their weekend place in the lesbian vortex of Western Mass. The most surprising thing about this real estate news (reported by the Huffington Post) is not that the loft was previously owned by REM's Michael Stipe, rather it is the purchase price of $1.25 million, which seems not so high for a loft with nice views and a fireplace in that part of town. Hmm. I could go for Benny's Burritos right now. However, it does have just one bathroom and not a lot of walls—which, in my experience of loft living, can grow tiresome despite the abundant room to dance around in one's underwear. During a recent unfortunate sleepless night, I had the pleasure of coming across Dr. Maddow on the Jimmy Fallon show sporting new blue nerd glasses. Good eyewear choice. The listing photos are below.

No longer hirsute under her suit?

One of my smart and gorgeous readers recently suggested a column idea on the topic of depilation: To shave or not to shave. For some of us, it's not a question. For others, it is. But what's interesting is that being unshaven does not seem to be the lesbo indicator it once was. Doesn't it seem like hairy legs and armpits were once an earthy territory traversed only by lesbians? In Armpit Hair, loud sapphist Alix Olson sings about the double standard of women needing to be hairless while men are accepted as furry (Alix raps: "I don't find that particularly pretty, so get your opinion out of my hairy pitty.") Alix's desire to have hairy pits seems a direct statement against the sexist standard of femininity imposed upon her by the patriarchy. But doesn't that stance almost seem like a throwback? All due respect to Alix Olson and the injustices of the patriarchy, of course. But these days, something else seems to be going on. Straight gals are going hairy, and lesbians are impeccably groomed. I have two pieces of empirical evidence, and by that I mean my anecdotal observations.

1. Young lesbians of today are much, much more groomed than those of a previous generation. Even the butches are plucking their eyebrows. Have you noticed this? It's true. In the last year or so I have made the acquaintance of two otherwise very butch young lesbians who have clearly put a lot of time and care into shaping their eyebrows. They wear a bit of eye makeup, even. Don't get me wrong. They look very nice. They are handsome young butches.
It's just not something you saw among the butches previously. Where did it come from? Is Shane imitating life, or is life imitating Shane? You see it even among our star butches. Rachel Maddow. Julie Goldman. It's clear these butches spend time in the salon. Unheard of a generation ago. Even the beloved Bearded Lady of Provincetown—famously unshaven—apparently is keeping her eyebrows shapely. By the way, I think you look great, Bearded Lady.

2. The second part of my argument is related to an arena I know of only through a lifetime of observation: Straight women. They seem to be going hairy. Tossing aside the customs of Betty Draper, some of them—still a minority—are hairy free spirits. Mo'Nique with her hairy legs at the Golden Globes. Julia Roberts waving a hairy underarm on the red carpet. Amanda Palmer flipping off the world with her pits. But the practice is not embraced by a mainstream that still wants its women hairless. A recent NYT article, Unshaven Women: Free Spirits or Unkempt?, said it was "brazen" to go unshaven in public. The article suggests there is a fear "that no man will want you and your hairy legs." So, despite everything, hairy female bodies are still seen as not heterosexual, and are, therefore, unwanted. Maybe Alix Olson is not such a throwback, after all.

Jane Lynch marries a Smithie in Western Mass

Isn't this a lovely picture? It appeared in The New York Times online Wedding/Celebrations page accompanying the marriage announcement of Jane Lynch and Dr. Lara Embry. Can't you just picture Joyce Wishnia making the marriage proposal? Oh, wait, you don't have to picture it, you can see for yourself!

The marriage took place at the Blue Heron restaurant in Sunderland, Mass., which is located in the Smith-Mount Holyoke lesbian vortex in the Northampton region of Western Massachusetts. And let us not ignore that the vortex includes the hill town where Rachel Maddow and her girlfriend Susan Mikula spend their TV-less weekends driving to the dump in Rachel's truck.

Lara Embry, the new spouse of Jane Lynch, is a former denizen of the Western Mass lesbian vortex. She's a 41-year-old Smith College alumna. (And as we know, choosy lesbians choose girlfriends who are graduates of The Sisters...) She is now a clinical psychologist who told the Times that, when she first met Lynch, she was"basically ignorant" of Lynch's career as a film and television actress. Um, what kind of lesbian does not know Joyce Wishnia?? In any case, best wishes to the newlyweds!

Thick Necks

It has come to my attention that the Sapphist Gazetteer's "thick neck theory" is a fan favorite. (You know who you are.) The theory simply states that lesbians—typically butches—have a disproportionately higher likelihood of having thick, sexy necks. Here, then, is a closer examination of the evidence:

Mary Cheney

Julie Goldman

Ellen Degeneres

Rachel Maddow

Rachel Maddow: 'It's Better To Be Out'

Our beloved big ole lesbian tomboy Rachel Maddow has encouraged all gay folks to come out. She made the appeal during an interview on Charlie Rose on June 18. The final two minutes of the 24-minute interview were dedicated to “the sexuality issue,” as Charlie phrased it. Rachel explained that coming out is “a different degree of traumatic for everybody,” but, nonetheless, she implied that we must be brave because she said being out is better for the individual and ethically right for the community. Maddow, 36, says she came out at age 17, which means she's been out for 19 years. So, as usual, Dr. Maddow knows what she's talking about.

The entire interview is worth watching, but, for the extra busy lesbians among us, The Sapphist Gazetteer, a master typist, has transcribed the gay bits for you:

Charlie: Was the sexuality issue ever an issue?

Rachel: I wish that I had figured it out earlier than I did.

Charlie: How did you figure it out?

Rachel: I just sort of arrived at it through rational deduction. [Laughs] I literally woke up one day and was, like, ‘Oh, that’s what’s been going on.’ [Snaps fingers and laughs]

Charlie: Was it easy?

Rachel: No. Coming out both to oneself and to one’s family is a different degree of traumatic for everybody. It wasn’t easy. I figured it out when I was about 17, and I wish I’d figured it out earlier. But I am glad; I’m happy for the decision to come out publicly very soon after I figured it out myself. So my time as a closeted person, which I think is a pretty awful place to be, was a very, very short period of time in my life, and for that I’m grateful.

Charlie: And that is the advice you give to every gay person, or do you say, ‘Everybody, find your own way.”?

Rachel: Find your own way, but it is better to be out than to be closeted. And I can say that in terms of quality of life, and in terms of what is ethically right for your community. It is better for other gay people if you’re out. The more people that come out, the better. And so that’s the only thing that I encourage anybody to do, and I certainly live that.

These Two

Rachel Maddow, our beloved big ole lesbian cable TV news commentator, and Ana Marie Cox, a frequent guest on Maddow's show, simply cannot contain their enthusiasm for each other. I've read, and, in fact, confirmed, with after all just a few degrees of lesbian separation between the Sapphist Gazetteer and Dr. Maddow, that Rachel has a girlfriend back home in Western Mass. Unfortunately, I have nothing to share about Ana Marie Cox because I have no idea who she is other than she writes for The Daily Beast. Let's just say she seems a kindred spirit to Rachel. Hence, the flirtatious energy between these two—even via teleconference, no less—is really quite marvelous.

Rachel Maddow

At my house we are fascinated that such a big honkin' variety of lesbian is on primetime television. And we're thrilled, of course. But we're intrigued by how this tomboy of the highest order is femmed up for television. Below is a before-and-after comparison. Also, on TV she's exposing a distracting amount of flesh, what with the extra-long neck and the plunging camisole. This is apparently an unwavering wardrobe policy. There is evidence, however, that her off-camera sartorial choices consist of flannel, Elvis Costello glasses, and hipster skateboard sneakers. In fact, The New York Times Magazine recently quoted Maddow saying she wears the sneakers while on air with the camisole-and-ladysuit combo; you just can't see them because she's standing behind that odd counter like she's ready to take your order at Wendy's. The sneakers remind her of who she really is, she says. Which means: A big ole lesbian. If you didn't see the piece in the Sunday Times Magazine–which also featured a photo of her Ford pickup truck a la Northampton–well, you should subscribe.