Covert Affairs. Maybe a little gay.

It may be apparent that I watch too much television. Given this, how is it possible that I missed the build up to Covert Affairs, which is the best new show on TV? Why is it so good, you ask? First, it's about spies. Second, it's just good—with potential—potential— to be almost (almost) as good as Alias. (Note: Do yourself a favor and watch this Alias link.) And lastly, Covert Affairs stars Piper Perabo, who we all love from her lesbian roles in Imagine Me & You and Lost and Delirious. As far as I can tell, Piper Perabo is straight. But the girl plays lesbians in movies, and we love her for that. Also, she told Curve magazine that her crush on Diane Keaton helped inspire her to play gay: "[Working with Keaton is] sort of dreamy, I have to say. She’s a magnificent woman. Magnificent. Intelligent, politically astute, artistic. She’s got a rockin’ bod for 60. I’m kind of infatuated with her. I follow her around like a puppy." Okaaay. Maybe Piper is a little gay.

Diane Keaton will have 'keen interest' in Ellen Page

Is that what we're calling it these days? "Keen interest"? Okay, that's fine. Better than "particular friendship."
But are we sure it's not Cynthia Mort developing a keen interest in Ellen Page?

As was reported earlier on the Sapphist Gazetteer, huge LA lesbian Cynthia Mort is creating an HBO series with Diane Keaton in which Keaton will play a much-feared entertainment industry blogger. The show is called Tilda. The latest news is that our girl Ellen Page has signed onto the series, playing a creative assistant at a movie studio. Entertainment Weekly reports that Keaton's character develops a "keen interest" in Page's character, who is conflicted about the film industry. (And perhaps her sexuality? Just a guess.)

It wouldn't be a first for a producer/director type to develop a keen interest in Ellen Page. After all, the 23-year-old Canadian actress is undeniably adorable. Drew Barrymore evidently found her hard to resist, as well.

Diane Keaton and the lesbian mafia

The lesbian mafia? Indeed, it looks like the five families called a meeting and came up with this one: Diane Keaton is in "late-stage talks" with HBO to do a show created by Cynthia Mort, the woman for whom Jodie Foster dumped her longtime companion Cydney Bernard.

(But then Mort, in typical dyke drama, turned around and dumped poor Jodes.)

In this HBO comedy called Tilda, Diane Keaton, who is fond of menswear, will apparently play a feared Hollywood blogger similar to the real-life Nikki Finke, who is a Wellesley grad. (I hope I do not need to explain the lesbian references flying all over the place here.)

LA Weekly described the casting choice thusly: "Diane Keaton, even at her most painfully neurotic, has never *not* been adorably ingratiating--the opposite of the kinds of adjectives often used to describe Finke..." By all accounts, Finke is not beloved in Hollywood because she is intelligent, not obsessed with how she looks, and does actual journalistic reporting on an industry which, for all its profiting from the First Amendment, does not generally celebrate the free press investigating the entertainment industry.

Mort's partner in the project is the talented and gay Bill Condon, director of queer-themed films Kinsey and Gods and Monsters. It's also important to note that Cynthia Mort is not afraid to write sex scenes for older women. Did you see Jane Alexander in Mort's bedroom drama Tell Me You Love Me? I think we can look forward to seeing Diane's trim little 64-year-old figure prancing about in Tilda.

In summary, we've got the adorable Diane Keaton, neckties, bow ties, Jodie's ex, Wellesley women, and a queer director. It's an offer we can't refuse.