Sapph Gaz Updates!

• Our boi Francesca Schiavone lost in the first round at Wimbledon yesterday. She fell to Russian Vera Dushevina in a grueling 3-hour match. There were high hopes for Schiavone coming off her French Open win a few weeks ago, and she was seeded 5th at Wimbledon. But the transition to grass was too much for her, and the length of the match seemed to take its toll on Schiavone—who turns 30 this week—even though she is considered among the fittest players in women's tennis. "It was a very tough match," she said. "It was different surface, a different feeling to Paris." The defeat is apparently heartbreaking for Mary Carillo in particular, who evidently has a thing for the small hot Italian. Carillo was quoted in Sports Illustrated after Schiavone's win in Paris: "Forza Francesca! So nice to see such emotion, elation. I've always admired Frankie for her fitness—especially those sturdy, highly Italian-looking legs. She walks like the women do in all the mountain villages: quickly, stoutly, resolute. So alive. Boy, I enjoyed that one."
We enjoy you, Mary.

•Over the weekend Tilda Swinton was in the gayest town in America to pick up her award at the 2010 Provincetown International Film Festival.
She told the local press that she was unaware she had won a prize—she thought she was there just to promote her new film I Am Love. She also said she's looking forward to retiring from acting so that she can tend to the chickens on her estate in Scotland. Here she is sampling some of the wicker furniture in Ptown. No word yet if she was spotted at the tea dance.

Tilda at the Tea Dance

The magnificent Tilda Swinton will be in Provincetown next month when she is honored by the wee but A-list Provincetown International Film Festival, which runs June 16-20 in the queerest town in America. The fun-loving homos in Ptown will show Tilda some love by bestowing upon her the 2010 Excellence in Acting Award, which seems to be in honor of her ouvre, rather than any of her particular remarkable roles. The Provincetown International Film Festival began in 1999 by honoring John Waters. I've seen this eccentric mustachioed Ptown resident riding his funny bicycle along Commercial Street, looking like a character in one of his films. I've also sat across the dining room at Victor's while the beautiful Michael Cunningham dined with the avant-garde director. Yes, I admit, when I was in college, I thought John Waters was pretty cool, especially when I went to a "scratch and sniff" showing of Polyester (I don't recall many other details, blessedly). I'm sure Mr. Waters will be attending the festival. No word yet if Tilda will bust a move at the Tea Dance.

Tilda Swinton is swayed by gay girl

Ladies, here is something to look forward to: Tilda Swinton in the Italian film I Am Love. I have full confidence that this film, which is due to open soon at my neighborhood independent theater, will be perfect for one of my favorite pastimes—watching Tilda Swinton. On screen everyone will be wearing gorgeous Italian clothes, walking pensively down long hallways in magnificent Italian mansions, and bursting at their couture seams with unspoken desire. And, best yet, a darling little cropped-haired lesbian plays the wise one. From what I gather, Tilda's daughter in the film comes out as a lesbian thereby sparking in her previously reserved mother a new passionate fire. In short, Tilda has a hot affair with a hot young uomo. During an interview at the Toronto International Film Festival you can see Tilda explaining things, such as "the concept of limitlessness" in choosing one's identity. Ah, I feel less inhibited already.

We love Tilda Swinton for so many reasons. Among them, of course, is her gender-bending film portrayal of Woolf's Orlando. We also love how she clearly does not abide by the standard rules of domesticity, as she evidently has a young lover in addition to her decades-long partner, the Scottish painter John Byrne, with whom she shares children and a manse on the shores of the North Sea in the rugged Scottish highlands. The UK's Daily Mail calls the place "a spectacular pile" at which Tilda can be seen "running around in an old green cardigan" and a "scruffy Land Rover." Although here she's seen in some expensive Pringle sweaters. For which, by the way, she is the new model for both the women and menswear collections. Appropriate, as the Daily Mail article also pointed out: "She has no vanity and has been mistaken—because of her height and androgynous features—for a man."